Ep. 160: Inner Grit: The Unshakable Mindset of High Performers
EPISODE 160
Inner Grit: The Unshakable Mindset of High Performers
About the Episode:
Something is missing in your recipe for success. Not a tool. Not a strategy. But something deeper: your inner grit. This isn’t about hustling harder or pushing yourself until you burn out. It’s about the strength you draw on when you’re tired, when the campaign feels heavy, when the grant report is due, and when your to-do list is longer than your capacity.
In this episode, I’m sharing why grit matters just as much as skill in fundraising, the mindset shifts that make it sustainable, and how to build your own reserve of inner strength so you can lead with clarity, joy, and resilience, even when the work gets hard. If you’ve ever felt like you’re running on fumes or questioning if you’ve got what it takes, this episode will remind you: you do. You just need to reconnect with it.
Here’s what you’ll learn:
Why inner grit is the missing ingredient in many nonprofit leaders’ success
How grit differs from hustle culture (and why that matters)
Practical ways to build mental and emotional resilience
The connection between grit and long-term fundraising success
Signs you’re running low on grit (and what to do about it)
Why skill without grit leads to stalled progress
How to rally yourself when you’re tired, overwhelmed, or uninspired
It’s not your stories—it’s how you’re telling them. If your amazing work isn’t getting the attention (and donations) it deserves, it’s time for a messaging shift. The Brave Fundraiser’s Guide guide gives you 10 done-for-you donor prompts to make your message impossible to ignore. Get it for free here! https://christinaedwards.krtra.com/t/xKuLs6tOiPZa
Christina’s Favorite Takeaways:
“Grit isn't something that you're born with. It's actually something that's built for nonprofit leaders, founders, and staffers; it's a non-negotiable.”
“You're not bad at fundraising; many times, you're just under practice at grit.”
“Inner grit is the skill that gets you to keep going and keep growing.”
“Most people don't quit. They just silently downgrade their ambition.”
“Grit isn't talent. It's tolerance for the hard thing.”
“Grit is passion plus sustained persistence over time.” Angela Duckworth
“Talent x effort = skill. Skill x effort = achievement.” Angela Duckworth
“Most people who are very successful in their industry have just put more effort into it.”
“It's not the destination, it's the journey.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
“I'm proud of myself for showing up.”
“Grit at its core, this muscle of mental strength, means choosing to become who you're meant to be, pushing your organization forward to the best place it's meant to be, even when it's uncomfortable.”
“When I have a goal that I don't hit, giving up is never an option.”
“When you don't yet have your full belief in yourself to do something, a coach can hold that belief for you.”
“Grit doesn't mean you love failure.”
“Puttering is just quitting in disguise.”
“The only way to get better at something is through practice.”
“Inner grit means your mission matters more than your momentary discomfort.”
“Don't confuse fatigue and failure.”
Episode Resources:
FREE Resources from Splendid Consulting:
How to Work with Christina and Splendid Consulting:
Easy Emails For Impact™ - Turn Your Inbox into an Income Stream
The SPRINT Method™ - Fundraise Like a Pro, 5 Figures At a Time
Connect with Christina and Splendid Consulting:
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Christina Edwards 0:15I'm so excited for this topic. It's something I've really wanted to explore on the podcast. It's a necessary step that I think a lot of nonprofit leaders and staffers and dreamers are missing in their overall recipe for hitting their goals, for feeling successful, for being the best version of themselves and really living in and leading into their purpose, which sounds like a big thing, right? But many, many organizations lately, I have been on decision calls with y'all. I have been on webinars with y'all. We just closed up an amazing launch for the purpose and profit club coaching program. So that gave me the opportunity to meet so many of you through webinars, through decision calls, through Q and A sessions. We also had several organizations who are phenomenal, solo led small teams join the sprint method. So I just feel like I've been in conversation with so many of you, and I'm noticing in your recipe, something is missing. So I want you to think about baking a cake, right? And you're missing like, a key element. I'm thinking baking powder, key element, right? That's what makes it rise. So this key element may not be the key element you want to talk about. This key element may not be the key element that you're like, Oh, I'm not excited about about, you know, growing in this way and yet that is keeping you stuck.
Okay, so we're gonna talk about grit today. Inner grit today is all about this inner mental muscle. So grit isn't something that you're born with. It's actually something that's built for nonprofit leaders, for nonprofit founders and staffers. It's a non negotiable. This work is so heart centered. This work is so important that cultivating this muscle of mental grit, inner grit is essential, and yet y'all are living over here in strategy land, which is also super essential, but you're relying solely on strategy to hit your goals, become the best version of yourself while not developing this muscle of inner grit. So that's what this episode is going to unpack today. It's going to unpack what inner grit is, how it actually shows up in real life, when fundraising feels personal, when fundraising feels hard, why your missions growth actually depends on you developing this skill, this inner skill, this skill that has, in fact, nothing and everything to do with your mission. So we're going to talk about this developing this skill on purpose, because most nonprofits don't stall because they don't care, or because they aren't smart enough, or because they just aren't good at it, right? They stall because their leader hasn't built this skill of inner grit to keep going, after the cringe, after the no, after the campaign didn't hit the goal. And this is true of staffers too. I don't want this episode to just be Oh, if you're the CEO of Executive Director, if you're the development person, if you're in communications, programs, marketing, y'all need grit too. You need this inner grit.
So let's dig in one. You're not bad at fundraising. Many times you're just under practice at grit. Inner grit is this skill, this continuum that, by the way, there is no end for where you're like, great. Now I have inner grit. It's a continuum. It's something you keep iterating on, right? You don't go to the gym and then work on your biceps and triceps and then just be done once you hit your goal, right? You have to go into maintenance mode. Okay?
Christina Edwards 4:33
Inner grit is the skill that gets you to keep going and keep growing. So there's some nuance there. It's the thing that is forward momentum. So most people don't quit. They actually just kind of silently downgrade their ambition. This looks like puttering along. They wait until it feels better. Wait until they get some help or some positive reinforcement externally, right in the form of a. Coworker, donor, something, saying Great job, or making that donation. You're looking for external input in order to keep going. That's not a strategy. That's self protection, right? That's not going to hit you to your goal. That's not going to get you to living into your purpose and really getting your mission to where you want it to be.
Christina Edwards 5:36
and with over 80% of nonprofits raising less than $50,000 a year, I know for certain, inner grit is a huge problem.
Christina Edwards 5:54
lack of inner grit is a symptom of that result. It's not because their missions aren't worthy, it's not because they're not helping people, it's not because they're not doing good in the world. It's because fundraising became a rock, they couldn't move like a boulder. And fundraising got harder and harder, and in their mind, the boulder got bigger and bigger and more and more immovable. They got a no. They didn't have the resilience to go again. And many of you may be listening and going, Christina, I gotta know, and I continue to go, but it says phoning it in style, going, okay. It does not have the energy behind it to move the boulder. It is placating. Okay. So there is a difference between leaders and staffers who build this muscle and the ones that don't. I talk to y'all all the time, and this comes up even on our coaching calls, there are organizations that will come get coaching, and staffers and leaders that come get coaching, and I can tell the difference between those who grow and those who stall. Is never just strategy, right? It's how they're thinking about that action, how they're thinking about their goal, how they're thinking about that campaign. The ones who've decided that discomfort doesn't mean stop. It means this matters. I'm going towards and through and talking to myself kindly in the process, those are the ones that succeed.
So let's dig in even more. Grit isn't talent. It's tolerance. It's tolerance for the hard thing. And this is the nuance. It's not white knuckle tolerance. You know that tolerance, right? That's like, I can go through this. It's like, hard and tight and grind energy. It's acceptance, kindness, it's mentally strong, with your eye on the prize, it's kind self talk. We're gonna get into that in a little bit. So let's dig into some research. So I'm a fan of Angela Duckworth book on grit, and we'll link to this in the show notes. And she she shares that grit is passion plus sustained persistence over time. I think that's really important to think about, because this mental growth, this growth mindset, this inner grit, is the long game, not the short game. It's not just the little dopamine hit. I know we all get when you get that $1,000 donation, and we should celebrate that, but it's the long game, the long commitment to you to this work, that is what develops a powerful inner grit, right? An inner tough toughness. So grit outperforms, and this is wild talent, IQ, resources, because it means you stay in the room and not stay in the room like a wallflower. Stay in the room with energy, with momentum, with perseverance.
Christina Edwards 9:22
I Angela goes on to explain her formula for grit, and she says talent times effort equals skill. Okay, so talent times effort equals skill. Skill times effort equals achievement. She says effort counts twice as much. The effort you put into it is twice as much. And for me, I need to think of this less as a math problem and more as a for instance, for this to like soak in. So maybe that's you too. So I want you to think about two people in front of a piano. One has a natural gift, a. And you like, you just, you just see it, and you're like, This person has, or this child even has a gift. There's this cute little boy on Tiktok, and this child has had drumsticks in his hand. I mean, I feel like, since, like, not even a year old, younger than that, this child is a phenom. He has a natural gift for drumming, right? So I want you to think about somebody like him, and he's like, doing drum fills. Now it's so cool. And he's like, three years old. So there's that natural talent, natural gift. They can pick up melodies by ear. And then I want you to think about the other person who doesn't have a natural talent. And if you're like me, maybe you had piano lessons growing up, but they sit down and they practice every day. The Gifted one might develop some early skill without much effort, like the little boy with the drumsticks, right? But the second person, because they stay consistent, because they apply effort over and over time, not only builds the skill, but it multiplies it. That's the power of grit. So for anyone that thinks that they're just not good at it, I wonder if you're thinking there's this other segment of people out there, those nonprofits, who are just visionaries and leaders in your sector, who you think are just naturally talented at it. And what if instead, they just had more inner grit, what if instead, they just had more effort? What if instead they were just more practiced? Because I would argue the phenoms are. We see them. They happen, but are the exception, not the rule? Most people who are very successful in this industry and in any industry have just put more effort in it, and, and, and this is really important to speak to burnout.
Christina Edwards 12:07
and have not put effort in a way that is grindy white knuckle effort. Instead, have developed this resilience, this inner resilience, this inner grit that moves them forward, that keeps them in it. And that's the nuance there is. It's not just about doing. It's about doing and enjoying doing and finding satisfaction in the process, not the product. Way, way back when, when I started this podcast, that was part of our intro, still is, which is, it's about enjoying the journey, not just the destination. It's not the $5 million nonprofit that you will be one day. It's the nonprofit you are now that is still in forward motion, that is still in forward momentum, even when you don't hit your goals, even when you hear the No, it's that. It's finding the joy in that, even when I remember, like, my one and only piano recital, totally, some missteps there, but I remember not feeling like, Well, I'm a bad person for, like, getting the keys wrong, right? It's okay. It's okay. I was in the arena, I was playing in front of a bunch of family members and whoever else came to that right? That's, that's the that's the skill we're developing here. So in fundraising, it's the same. It's not the people with the slickest branding or the biggest teams come on or the most charming story who grow the fastest. It's the ones who come back after they hear a no after the quiet post with no engagement, which you were sure, you were sure this was going to be the viral moment right after the campaign that had a $10,000 goal, and you just poured your heart and soul into it, and it kind of puttered in at $1,200 and then you say, so, there's two types of people here. There's the people who have the inner grit who say, Okay, let's go again. Smarter, smarter, bolder, louder, let's go again. Let's figure out how we can iterate. And you take that thing and you take that campaign with a $10,000 goal all the way to the finish line, full throttle, versus the nonprofits without the skill of inner grip, who somewhere in the middle of the campaign, they can see it's not going how I thought it would, and they just phone it in, that inner monolog is critical, that inner monolog is defeated. There's no point. I've asked everyone, this is a flop. I don't know what to do anymore. That's the inner monolog. And you just let it fizzle. And then after the campaign, you tell yourself, Well, that didn't work. And instead of saying, Let's go again, smarter, bolder, louder, you just give up. Now give up does not mean hang your hat and quit your job, close your nonprofit. No. So give up is a silent give up. Give up is doing actions that are not expansive and are not pushing you into the best version of yourself, doing actions that are pretty comfy and cozy, doing actions that don't require you to put yourself into a situation where you might hear some more nos, hear some more rejections, do something new, right? That's the type of giving up that, I mean. So it's like Silent giving up.
Christina Edwards 15:56
you. Let's dig in to that inner dialog, so the inner dialog of somebody without this mental grit when that 10k campaign raises $1,200 or the donor looks you in the eye and says, No, can't do it. Or the board member tells you, your work is cute, not scalable. The board member says, I'll help, but never does write any sort of curveball. Those external facts may be the same, but the inner dialog is completely different, depending on your level of grit. The self talk of somebody without grit sounds like this is embarrassing. I shouldn't have tried that. I'm not cut out for this. No one wants to give to us. Oof that one hurts. I don't want to bother people again. This was a mistake. That was a sign I need to pull back. See this confirms that I'm not good at this. I'm not cut out for this. That is a shame spiral. You with me. They let one event, one circumstance, one no or even a series of nos, define their capacity as a nonprofit leader, as a non profit fundraiser, right? And then they retreat and go silent and tell themselves, I'm being strategic by waiting. Listen, Christina, I'm giving there some breathing room, right? Versus, let's contrast this with the self talk of somebody with inner grit, with strong inner grit. Well, that didn't land, but I learned something. And then they asked themselves, what did I learn? I'm proud of myself for showing up. Y'all write this one down. I'm proud of myself for showing up. That is one of the step one things I would write on a post it note that you tell yourself every time you do this work. I'm proud of myself for showing up. Hell yeah. Let me try this new angle. I'm building my skill set. This is part of it. I've survived worse. A no is just a stepping stone to a yes. Next time, I'll get closer to the results I want. They move forward, they iterate. They get louder, more specific and more curious. Do you see the difference between the self talk of somebody with low inner grit is very punitive, it's unkind, it's tight, it's dismissive, it's mean, versus somebody with stronger inner grit is curious. It has forward momentum. Is kind is like a best friend might talk. So if you're talking to your best friend, and your best friend said to you, they totally screwed up a presentation at work, or they had a big misfire, you know, they copied the wrong person on the email to the vendor. Right? Something, right? You would be like, you really screwed that up. Jesus. What if you're terrible at your job, right? You would never say that to your best friend, right? How would you speak to your best friend? You'd be like, people make mistakes. You're human. You had a human moment. Maybe you would even talk about next steps, what they learned from it, what they could do differently. It would be such a different conversation. So somebody with an inner grit, and this is a hack, too, has that inner monolog, inner dialog that you might have through best friend energy,
Christina Edwards 19:25
grit at its core, this muscle of mental strength means choosing to become who you're meant to be, pushing your organization forward to the best place it's meant to be, even when It's uncomfortable, and in fact, expecting it to be uncomfortable. Okay, I'm out of fingers as to how many times I can count when things didn't go my way, when I didn't hit my goals in my own business, like I don't have enough, there's too many hours this would take too long for me to tell you all the ways I've had launches that. Didn't hit my goal. I've had discovery calls where I'm like, Whoa, what's that? I've had proposals I sent out that I didn't get. I've had awkward follow up processes. I've had too many no's to tell you about right? And yet, year after year after year, my company has experienced wild growth, especially in the last four years, right? I've had so many instances where I was certain this was going to be the thing, right, this was going to be the thing, and it just wasn't, right. This was going to sell out, this was going to get me to where I wanted to be, this email was going to be the thing. This campaign was, and it just wasn't. And the only difference between me and hundreds and 1000s of other small business owners, consultants and coaches who now don't have businesses, who are now back in house, who are now working freelance, is that I didn't retreat when those setbacks happened. I moved forward. That's it. I moved towards the thing. I got curious. Okay, do I need to add in more emails? Okay, where do I need to build the skill on these discovery calls? Where do I need to learn more about launching with webinar like whatever it is? Maybe this is a skill building issue. Maybe this is a mental toughness issue, right? That's it. I got more creative. In fact, some of my best launches have been because of bad launches that were prior. Does that make sense? So on the heels of a shitty launch, something would drop in, I would like, think process how I'm feeling, which is, would be disappointment, right? Bummed. And then something would drop in where I'm like, Oh, I have this idea. I'm going to try this workshop. Let me do this. And that would be the the springboard to an amazing launch. That's all it was. And it's sort of like, say, you have that $10,000 campaign, you bring in $1,200 now, the difference between me and you and that is you retreat. You tell yourself, I've got to give everybody a break. We already were on a campaign. I iterate. I'm like, Ooh, what's like a side door we could go through. Ooh, what's an idea here? I end up making 20k instead of that 10k That's how we do and when I think about my executive directors, I think about my fundraisers and my marketers who are rock stars in my programs. They have that skill too. They're not like, Well, that was that. I guess I'll wait three months from now until our next campaign. They're like, hell no, hell no. Where else? What else could we do? Where can I get curious? Where can I get on the phone with somebody? It's moving towards, not away.
Christina Edwards 22:59
So getting more creative, more you not believing that failure was the end, not silently quitting, like those are really important pieces of this. And this isn't about toughing it out. It's about staying grounded in your purpose, deciding to go through that moment and not bail on yourself in the name of perfection or comfort. I'm here. I have sat on so many calls with whether it's other consultants and coaches who are building their business or tech companies who are learning about what I do. And many times they'll ask me, you know, how long I've been doing this, and my whole life this, my entire career, is as an entrepreneur. This is it. I'm 100% in right? I love this work, and so when I have a goal that I don't hit, giving up is never an option. It's huh? Guess there's a different way. I need to take a different route to get there, or maybe there has moved right? Maybe I want to rethink it. It's signing up for the fact that, like, this is uncomfortable work, and yet I'm all in, because this is the work I was meant to do. I think if you're listening to the podcast, this podcast, you're agreeing. You're like, Yeah, this is the work I meant to do, Christina, and so that discomfort is totally part of it. And when I realized that about a decade ago, it got easier because I didn't go I stopped waiting for it to feel comfortable, and I just realized, Oh, this is just part of the deal. I'm going to get nervous, I'm going to flub, I'm going to get tongue tied, I'm going to have typos on slides. I'm going to have challenges hiring. I'm going to like all of it, all of it, all of it, all of it. Don't wait to be great at it. Great is just something that happens while you're doing it right. That's it. So this is exactly why we coach. This is exactly why I've added. Did and created mindset coaching into my programs, meaning way back when, when I was doing more consulting, it was mainly based in strategy, right? And what I realized was, I can give you all the strategy all day long, but what was keeping you from implementing the strategy and then doing the strategy again, and iterating and getting better again and again and again was the coach factor. And if we go back to the piano example, having a piano teacher that's just like, here, practice your stuff. Get Better go is a totally different experience than somebody who's literally guiding you, supporting you and coaching you through it, who's like, hey, try this, do this that way. Hey, noticed on your recital, you got a little chopped up here. Let's iterate. Let's practice on it. What if we do it this way? Right? That's the power of a coach. And the last thing that I think is so important is coaching is when you don't yet have your full belief in yourself to do something, a coach can hold that belief for you. I believe in you first. If you join my programs, not everybody is well suited to join my programs. And if you join my programs, I believe in you. I believe in you so you don't have to have like, 100% belief, because I will hold that belief for you. That's why we coach. So if you don't have necessarily a question, like, you know, how much of a donor match that should I secure, or what should the name of my next fundraiser be? Or how do I get more people to engage with it, or donors to come in? And instead, you're just like, Christina, I'm locked up on this one thing I need to do, and I needed to have done it for the last 60 days. That's a mindset issue, that's a grit issue. Or I'm feeling really heavy and hard right now in our sector, that's a grit issue. Let's coach on it. That's the work that we do in our programs. Because we give you the strategy, we give you the templates, we give you the systems and tools, but we also give you the mindset that inner work is essential. That's why I do both. That's why there's no other program that does that, that does both. That's why I love what we do. So we do this in the club. This is for established nonprofits who are doubling their next campaign. It's perfect for small teams who are growing to a million and plus, then in the sprint method. That is for my emerging nonprofits who maybe you're a newer nonprofit, a solo Ed, a part time fundraiser. That is the program for you. So if you have questions about either the best place to go is splendid, atl.com, forward slash start where you can kind of choose your own ending and get a little bit more information about what we do.
Christina Edwards 27:54
Let's wrap up with what grit is and isn't today. Grit doesn't mean you love failure. I don't love failure either, right? It means you stop making failure mean something about you. You stop making failure mean something shitty about you. You with me. Puttering is just quitting in disguise. Okay, so watch out for where you're puttering along, doing a lot of email, checking, a lot of admin stuff. You're not bad at it, you're just under rehearsed. Okay? You're not bad at fundraising, you're not bad at building your nonprofit. You're not bad at marketing. You're just under rehearsed. And the only way to get better at it is through practice. That is it. You cannot read another book on how to do this. You've got to get in the arena, and you've got to start doing it. Inner grit means your mission matters more than your momentary discomfort. Okay, think about that. Am is it worth it to me to make that call feel a little sweaty, feel a little squirmy for a couple of minutes, in the name of living my purpose, in the name of becoming a excellent leader, an excellent fundraiser, in the name of becoming somebody who impacts more people, right? This work takes mental reps, so don't confuse fatigue and failure. Okay, it's really important to think about even when you fail. I'm getting my reps in. Get my reps in. That's the self talk you want to cultivate.
Christina Edwards 29:37
So be someone so be someone who shows up even when it's hard, especially when it's hard, that's the inner grit you're going to start working on cultivating. I'm excited for next week, because next week will help be the peanut butter and jelly to this sandwich. I'll see you in the next one. Bye.