Ep. 105: Choosing to be the Hero Rather Than Wallowing in Resignation
EPISODE 105
Choosing to be the Hero Rather Than Wallowing in Resignation
About the Episode:
I’m coming to you after just arriving home from my month-long trip to Panama, blending remote work with family vacation. I thought I would share the mixed reactions we received about our adventure and relate this to how organizations often face skepticism when trying new ideas. The main theme revolves around the concept of how thoughts become our reality and how our beliefs drive our actions towards achieving goals. I’m touching on the think-feel-do cycle, illustrating it with inspiring examples like athlete Anna Hall’s use of affirmations to qualify for the Olympics. I also share a cautionary tale from a local restaurant in my neighborhood that failed due to poor marketing strategies, highlighting the importance of proactive customer engagement. Through these stories, I emphasize the power of positive thinking and visualization in overcoming challenges and achieving success. If you’re ready to become the hero of your cause rather than being stuck in resignation, this episode is for you.
Topics:
How your thoughts become your reality and can positively or negatively influence growth, funding, and visibility.
The think-feel-do cycle and how this cognitive-behavioral concept affects goal achievement.
How to use affirmations and visualizations to achieve your goals (inspired by olympian, Anna Hall)
Two of the biggest lies you can tell yourself when it comes to being loud in your marketing
The power of doing just one thing for your cause every day and how this creates more inspired action
Putting your biggest fans and supporters at the forefront of your decision making for your organization
Getting away from resignation and frustration and centering yourself as the hero of your cause
Think you’ve reached out to “everyone” in your network? Out of ideas to get noticed and get funded? Generate leads for your nonprofit or social impact business: https://www.splendidcourses.com/prospect
Christina’s Favorite Takeaways:
“You decide the appropriate channel of who is actually making the decisions and you go, you don't wait for 100% buy in.”
“Have you tried everything? No, because no one has tried everything.”
“One of the biggest ways I can move from a space of feeling negative to a more positive emotion like motivation is if I think about the people I want to help.”
“Our beliefs are a choice, you can choose to believe that it's hard, and you will prove it true, it will be hard. You can choose to believe that people are here to support you and help you and you will find the helpers.”
“How we're thinking and how we’re feeling informs which actions we take.”
“Ask yourself, how can I be the hero of my story here and not expect a rescue boat to come up? Right? Rather than just expecting life preservers to come floating my way, how can I be the hero here?”
“I like to think with intention on my goals as if I've accomplished them and not an intention of something that seems impossible, or too aspirational and too far away.”
Episode Resources:
FREE Resources from Splendid Consulting:
How to Work with Christina and Splendid Consulting:
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Christina Edwards 00:13
Hello, friends. One more type hello friends. Today on the podcast, I'm going to share a couple of different stories with you. And to start at the time I'm recording this, I just came back from a month long trip, I was in Panama, and maybe I'll record a separate episode about that. But it was so fun. It was so fun. I did a bit of remote work, I did a bit of vacationing. And it was our first time as a family being away from home that long and really exploring a new place. So I had been to Panama before. But it was the first time that my kids got to go and my husband and how amazing it was to not only see an amazing client of mine that lives there full time and is opening a nonprofit there. But also my family. So I got to see my cousin and her boys. And it was such a good time. And when we first decided to make the trip and make it kind of a longer term thing, it was a lot of unknowns, right? Because anytime the first time you do anything is just full of a lot of unknowns. And it was really funny. Because when we told people, Hey, we're taking part of summer and we're going to Panama for for a month, we got one of two reactions, we there was like no middle, we either got, oh my gosh, how fun, what an adventure, what a cool opportunity for your kids. And amazing, you got to tell us all about it. So we got option A and then this is what option B sounded like, Huh? Why? And I share that with you. Because it was hard to be on the receiving end of somebody of the 10th somebody who was like, you know, eyebrows furrowed, wrinkled shifted head going, Why? Why are you doing that? Does that make sense? That's random, like kind of judgmental. And there will be times in your organization, where you've got a great idea where you're thinking outside the box, where you want to try a different kind of event where you want to try a new campaign, a new brand, a new something, right? You're taking a risk, and especially boards, but really just the people around you may not all think, what a great idea. And you have to hold your own and hold space for your vision of it and not wait for 10 out of 10 people to tell you. Yep, great idea, Christina, take the leap. Because there will be cheerleaders in your circle in your corner. And there will be people who just it's not for them. And that's okay. And don't let it like color taint and form. Change your hope your dream your movement and momentum towards that thing, just because they don't get it. I see this a lot with boards, because boards are naturally full of diverse opinions. They should be right. And so not everybody's going to agree that that like is the exact event name, we should go with the exact venue the exact thing, the exact date, time place, right? And you decide and appropriate channel of like, who is actually making the decisions and we go, we don't wait for 100% by him. So for all the people who were like, Huh, why are you doing that? I'm excited to tell them why. And now that they've seen pictures, they're like, Oh, we actually had a couple of family members here in the States reach out once we started sharing pictures of the beaches going oh my god, we're looking at property there. Now we're looking at vacation rentals. Now. I had no idea. I'm like, Yeah, you guys are sleeping on Panama. It is gorgeous. So today, we're going to talk about this idea of thoughts becoming things. So you may have heard this, I don't know who coined it thoughts become things and how it really can inform your growth, your funding your visibility. Okay. So on many trainings before I've shared this idea of the think, feel do cycle. So this is something from many different coaches and even in cognitive behavioral therapy, they've talked about how, basically your beliefs and cause your feelings which drive your actions, and then outcomes, think feel do Okay, and how you're thinking and how you're feeling can get you towards your goal or away from your goal. So I like just think about it in this way, you can actually have the same goal. And based on your thinking and your feeling, you're going to do very different things and one is going to put you towards your goal and one is going to push you away from your goal. I'm going to give you a very specific example of this book. Hey, I'm gonna give you two. The first is and we're gonna link to it in the notes here. This has been so fun because it's like Olympics time. And her name is Anna Hall and a hall is a heptathlon runner. Okay, and she went viral on I think Twitter originally, but I have it on Instagram. And she won. Let's see the track and field trials, okay. And she's a leading qualifier for it this weekend. And what she shared were were images from her journal images from her journal, and I'm going to read you just a few of her journal, or a few of her journal links. So these are phrases, affirmations, thoughts, she's thinking on purpose beliefs she's taking on in advance of her trial. So one of the things she said is, I can, I will, I must today I will become an Olympian. Let's see here. She says, I'm still here. This is my event, my title, I'm going to get my spot, I'm going to take it. I love this one. She wrote really, really big in her journal, prove them wrong. I believe she had a knee injury. And so that's probably in response to that. Another page. She said today, oh boy, come and Olympian enjoy it. I love that you are that really big and underlined, to enjoy it. This is not this is for you to it's not about reaching your goal through hustle through tight through grind. It's about reaching your goal and understanding that the journey is the destination. I think Joey goon said that on a previous podcast, right? The journey is part of the entire experience. Okay. She writes down her like long jump times, she writes down, she really goes into like, what it is she's forecasting, okay. And guess what she did incredible. Like she said, we're going to Paris in the last week, she qualified, it was so fun. So we'll link to that. Okay, so thoughts become things. Imagine if every morning you wrote down, whatever it is, you're working towards one of our purpose and profit clubbers inside of the program, we were talking about their year and like between now and your end, how much they want to fundraise. Okay. And as they were going through it, I said to them, it took them about maybe 60 to 90 seconds to actually tell me, we want to erase x by your end, what I told her was, I want that to come out. Like in two seconds. I want you to repeat that every single day. Hey, by December 31, we will have raised x by December 31. We will have recess. I told her, I want you to visualize what the 2025 You know, there's like silly crowns you put on for two years. If I want you to visualize, you're putting on the 2025 crown and you did it, you hit that funding goal, like really go to the place where you've accomplished this. Okay? And here's why that matters. Here's why that matters. Because when you come to the come from the place of thinking it's hard or far away, or I'm not sure I can I can do it. Those thoughts are going to create feelings like insecurity, like questioning it, right? Like uncertainty, right? And from insecurity from uncertainty. Most people go inward, most people hide. And it's very hard to fundraise. It's very hard to tell great stories. It's very hard to market when you're hiding, you're going inward. Alright, so here's the real real story. So in my neighborhood in Atlanta, there is a restaurant that has been in our neighborhood for I'm gonna say 510 years and this has is part of a restaurant group that has multiple locations. Recently, this particular location they closed and they sold the business to a new owner and with that new ownership they changed the name what they did is they said hey guys, we it was a good handoff like the old owner said hey, we're selling the business. Nothing's gonna change it has a new name but it's the same great menu and food you've always loved. Okay, so the person the new owner has the same great menu we know and love. They have a new name. they've acquired the everything so the restaurant the location, the email list, the loyalty cards, all of the things right so the customer base. Now what happened next is unfortunately very common in the restaurant business, which is he just really got quiet customer service or customer bla bla, Let me redo that what happened next is unfortunately really common in the restaurant world. So business took a huge nosedive, and it was apparent right away every time I drive by the restaurant. It was like crickets even on you know Saturday night, or lunchtime rush, and what their marketing looked like after that initial handoff was a monthly email, same email we always were used to write, and maybe an occasional post in a neighborhood Facebook group, but for the most part, they were relying on customers to just come to them by just the sake of them existing. Right? They had a nice corner. They had a nice corner spot. And they just expected that the customers that had been there all those many years would also, you know, continue to say, and that is not what happened. That is not what happened. So they didn't do a whole lot of marketing. And I remember when the sign changed, I was like, huh, the sign they put up a was looked like a temporary sign that they never really got the full, you know, more professional looking sign. So it had some bumps on the road, right? And they were like, my marketing brain just was always like, Oh, they should do this. They should try that. Right? What are some ways that they can actually go out into the community and brings breathe some life in to this restaurant. So what happened next is about a month ago, my husband tells me that he got an email. And they posted in a Facebook group or several Facebook groups that unfortunately, they announced their closing, so they're closing up shop for good. And the 30 days that followed was just insane. It was it was just like, I couldn't even believe it. So they announced their closure. We're closing in 30 days, we're so sad to close. Come see us before we close, right? And then the 29 days that followed, they went all hands on deck marketing, all hands on deck. They had countdown emails, they had lots of Facebook community posts, they were in different groups. The chef was talking different restaurants, different managers were building up, come see us, here's what we're cooking. It was like they had breathed new life new energy into the fact that they were closing was so odd. And it made me think about this idea of are you going to be you're the hero of your story of your mission of your cause of you your life? Or are you going to be in resignation, right? And the 11 months that preceded it, they were in resignation. So if we go back to the think, feel do cycle, I'm going to take some guesses on what they were thinking. They were thinking people already know about our business people already know we're here. Customers will come. I've already emailed. I've already posted they know, I don't want to bother them. I don't want to bug them. Right. Have you ever thought that about your supporters about your donors about your clients? Right? They already know I've heard that so many times about fundraising campaigns. I've already said it, Christina, I don't need to say it again. And you're leaving money on the table. You're doing your own mission, a disservice with that thought your resigned your resignation, right? Versus how can I be the hero of my own story here? Right? How can actually show up and lift up this cause this mission and get loud, they got so loud at the end, they were doing daily emails, they were being scrappy. They were being imperfect, they were being fiery, they were being excited. It was the most excited. I've been about this restaurant. It's the most we've talked about this restaurant since the changing of ownership a year ago, right? And my husband said this, and I was like, That's it. He said you had this in you the whole time. And it was like, Yeah, this owner they had this in them their whole time. Where was it? Why wait till the bitter end? Why wait until you're done for this fire? And let's answer that question. Why did they wait? Why did they wait until the very end? To go out with a bang? Why not go in and give it your all those 11 months preceding it? Well, it's probably because they're worried they're gonna bug people because they believe they've tried everything. And those are two of the biggest lies you can tell yourself, right? Because they didn't try everything. They tried everything on day 29 day 18 day to day one, right? They were just unrelenting at that point. Right now, this doesn't mean that I'm saying email your list every day. And you know spam Facebook neighborhood groups talking about this your cause? No, but this means that when you find yourself in a place of feeling like your your revenue has plateaued. Or you're feeling like you've tried everything you want to check that you want to check that belief. And you can ask yourself, is that true? Has it have I tried everything? Is it true? Have I tried everything? No. No one's tried everything right. Another way you can ask yourself is what am I not yet willing to try? What could I try that I feel a little wobbly about what feels a little risky to try. And risky often means the follow up risky often means asking somebody for a warm intro risky. Risky often means pitching yourself to the media. And then you say to me, but I don't know how, what if you just tried? What if you just tried? What if there was no perfect way? Right? So really letting yourself go from the place of feeling insecure, feeling resigned, feeling uncertain, moving to the place of open or motivated? I love that, that feeling of like, how do I step into motivation here, one of the biggest ways I can move from a space of feeling negative to a more positive emotion, like motivation is if I think about people, I want to help. And I know you're that way too. You want to help people. That's why you're listening to this, I want to help people. That's why I'm making this. So if I get out of my own way, and I think about how I can help you, then I can go okay, what's motivating here? Let me write the email not for the person who may unsubscribe, let me write the email for the person who missed my last three, I'm gonna write it for them, or for the person who was interested in did need help, but got distracted? Or could use a little reminder, right? So how do you redirect yourself? When you find yourself in sort of a negative space, or maybe just an unhelpful space? In your work week in your daily practice, right? The first piece is just realizing that it's normal, it's normal, you're not going to stay in motivation land 100% of the time. Okay. So the first piece is just like, the awareness, and that it's normal. No one is just right here on you know, motivated, 24/7, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. We need the rest. We need the retreat, we need to go inward so that we can go outward. So you want both you want the contrast. Decide your beliefs with intention. And if you listen to the podcast intro, that's what we talk about. We think thoughts on purpose, we think thoughts with purpose with intention, because our beliefs are a choice. Our beliefs are a choice, you can choose to believe that it's hard, and you will prove it true, it will be hard. You can choose to believe that people are here to support you and help you and you will find the helpers. Remember, Mr. Rogers, look for the helpers. The helpers are here, just as much as the naysayers are here, right? Both things are true. But I'd rather focus on the helpers, because that drives me to a place that is motivating and inspired and brings my work brighter and lighter into this world. So you can also ask yourself, What's also true here? So even if you're like, listen, here's 10 reasons why it's not working, or 10 reasons why I've tried everything or 10 reasons why it's hard. I want you to write a 10 reasons why, or 10 reasons. In that, what, what else could be true here. Go to Bat for the other side. Okay, find the lightness in the darkness. It doesn't mean that you're telling yourself that it's all sunflowers and rainbows and daisies, but it's like what also is also true here. What could be motivating here? I like to think about like, what's one step I could take? Because oftentimes, we're feeling like I imagined this restaurant owner was feeling for the past 11 months, like throwing his arms up in the air going, what gifts, I took over this profitable restaurant, and now it's taking what gifts, right? When you're in that space, you want to ask yourself every single day, what's one step I can take? In Laura Belgrade's interview, she talks about on the podcast about her book, she said, I loved it. So stuck with me. She said, What's one thing I can do for the book today? Right? Because she was asking people all the time, will you share this book? Can I be on your podcast, pitching the media, doing book signings, really just publicizing the book? She said, a publicist, she's an author, a writer, right? And that was an easy work to say, let me be out there and just constantly be showcasing my book, right, nine months in, you're probably like, who else can I ask? Right? Who else can I say to talk about the book, there's always more people. And when that feels overwhelming drill down. What's one thing I can do for the book today? Boom, there it is. What's one thing I can do for my cause today? And don't tell yourself it's writing a blog or don't tell yourself that it's tinkering with your website? You know, what's one donor I can call today? What's one prospect I can call today? What's one partner? I can ask to be a sponsor today. What's one meeting I can book today? What's one thank you I can make today? What's one authentic transparent video I can share today. What's one story I can share that I've never quite said? That feels a little bit vulnerable today. Right. That's where the inspired action comes from. Right? And that's where, again, if we think about the sink field do cycle. And the first thing I always put at the top of that page is what's the goal we want? Well, the goal we want is more funding, we can find more people, we can, we can fund more, we can impact more. Okay? So when we do that our goal may be the same, just like it was for this restaurant owner. But how we're thinking and how we're feeling informs what actions we take. So even though we want more funding, we really want to regulate and think about what feelings can be more motivating, more inspiring before I take these actions, because I want to be over here, being bold, and daring and courageous. Fundraising, storytelling, marketing, creating a social street team of partners and ambassadors. That's what I want to be doing. Not going inward and not spiraling and getting angry or frustrated or overwhelmed. Another way you could do this is ask yourself, what would be another thing you could ask yourself is, what would my biggest fans or supporters say? What did they want to hear? What would be inspiring or in service to them? Okay, so if we think about the restaurant owner, right, that he can think about who are my best customers? What did they want to know? Do they want to know what maybe fresh produce? We got it having to wait? They want to know about specials? Do they want a better rewards program? Like, ask them? Don't guess? Ask them and really say what would be in service to them? What would be most helpful to them? And start ideating from there? So really saying to yourself, how can I be the hero of my story here? And not expect to just rescue boat to come up? Right not expect just life preservers to come floating my way? How can I be the hero here? And it requires for me, it requires first step getting into awareness and stepping out of the place that I'm in getting away from resignation, or getting away from frustration, and saying, Okay, what's one step I can take today, what's one step I can take right now. And the only way I can do this and get into the motivation is thinking about being in service. If you want help with this mindset piece, this motivation piece, and the strategy pieces, that's the work we do in my group coaching program, the purpose and profit club, we will be opening up enrollment with special bonuses later this month. So make sure you get on the waitlist to find out more. So your homework, if you want to do it is some journaling. Do some journaling of best case scenario, do some journaling of you hitting your goal just like that Olympian did, she's like, I'm going to make this this is going to be my time it's happening, this was made for me really get into that space, and don't do it once. Get into a practice where you're doing it a few times a week, once a day, don't tell yourself you have to do it in the morning. That's one of the biggest lies you tell yourself, just do it. I don't care if you do it at night. If you do it at 1159, it doesn't matter. Just get into the practice of really thinking with intention. And I like to think with intention on my goals as if I've accomplished them and not an intention of something that seems impossible, or too aspirational and too far away. So for for example, that organization, thinking about like what would be best case, what do they really want to raise this year? Right and really thinking about some steps they can take to to raise that what who do they need to know that they don't know right now? What meetings what rooms do they want to get in front of? Right? What events do they need to be at? Right? What? Who do they need to meet? What are those conversations and then saying, How do I do that? Reverse Engineering? Who do I need to get in contact with that may have a connection there? Is it in person? Is it through LinkedIn, really getting scrappy and figuring out those pieces? That's the first piece are really thinking about that. Watch yourself on some of those beliefs that come up throughout the week, which is like maybe those beliefs of feeling like you've tried everything or feeling like you're resigned in certain places and asking yourself, How can I create some fire? Where is the fire, right? How can I create some fire for making this happen? Okay, and where would be or what would be in in the greatest service for my audience. Okay. Many of us are thinking about this time of year, this concept of a social street team. So this is a concept that I created. I teach inside my programs. And this is the visibility piece. So we talked a lot about fundraising. But the visibility piece is how do I get more so whether it's more donors, more clients, more supporters, we do this through a digital ambassador program. We're gonna be talking a lot about this in the club this fall. So if you want to work with online influencers, digital ambassadors, so they can use their social networks, their platforms to advocate for your cause, I highly recommend you join the waitlist. Alright, I'll see you next time.